A Wrinkle (or two) in Time

Y'know what is a pain in the tuckus? Trying to get a good photo - it gets harder and harder to find the right angle and lighting as the years go by. One try displays the tummy in all its glory, another the triple chin, a third the mottled skin and red eyes, a fourth the stunning loss of hair. Fat face, gray hair (what's left of it), skinny arms, and wrinkles.

It's all vanity anyway, and I know that the best thing to do is forget it. People like photos for remembering people, times, places, and events. Not for what I looked like at the time. Still and all, I find myself critiquing every photo and saying to myself "next time tilt your head this way, smile differently, suck in the gut, etc, etc. Do I ever remember those things? No.

Photo albums, in books or digital format do one thing unbelievably well. They remind us that we are mortal, that we are all subject to same physical laws of wearing out (all except Cher and Goldie, of course), and that we will take our place in history along side the billions that have gone before us. It is only a matter of time.

I try to grin and bear it. Most of the time I am successful. Every now and again I think about visiting the hair loss clinic, checking out skin rejuvenation methods more extreme than lotions, teeth whitening, face lifts, getting a body trainer, and, of course various "male enhancement methods". Ah well - it is to laugh. I don't think I will ever actually do any of those. If I can live with seeing lots of scalp, a paunch, multiple chins, and that "old person" posture, then others can live with it too. In the intimacy dept., well, we just have to work harder, don't we? Lower lights can help as well for the self-conscious, I've found.

Hey - aging sucks. But consider our only alternative. Suddenly it doesn't seem so bad. So I walk a little slower, eat a little better, spend more time in the mirror becoming presentable, and exercise more. It's not a cure for aging, but it is a way of taking action against a common enemy, so to speak. That in itself makes me feel better.

So I have joined the legion that says things like:
"I earned my gray hair"
"Wrinkles add character"
"I enjoy my food"
"Now I look more distinguished"
"I don't care what others think"

and so on.

Works for me!

Oh, and if you aren't "there" yet, you young skallywags, you...well, just wait. You'll get there. It's guaranteed.

Unless you're Cher. You will look perfect until you are 110. Then you will get hit by an errant ping-pong ball at a party, and you will shatter into a thousand pieces...